Daddy

Oh, where to start? So much has happened since my last post. My dad, Franklin Lars "Jake" Flake passed away last Sunday (June 8th) morning, and the past week was truly a whirlwind. (Because I use this for my journal, it may be more detailed than you care to read. I won't be offended.)

I can't even remember anything that happened the week before last, other than our basketball game on Monday night, which we won. Oh yeah, I did take Josh swimming at Celeste's pool on Thursday with Mindy's family. We had fun, but I didn't have any floating thing to put him in, so I just had to hold him the whole time. It was fun, but since then he's been a little hoarse.

On Friday night David, Josh and I went up to Snowflake for my nephew Shiloh's wedding on Saturday. We attended the wedding and the reception that afternoon up in Show Low. Shiloh and Danica (pronouced Dan-EEK-ca) look very happy. My dad was also able to attend both the wedding and the reception, in addition to dedicating a grave-site for one of his friends that day.

That evening Dad was pretty tired from all of the day's activities so appearantly that night he was going to sit down and relax for a while before putting his oxygen tube on and "going to bed" in the hospital bed that was set up in the family room for him. (I guess he would often switch between the bed and my mom's recliner during the night, because he would get uncomfortable.) On Sunday morning he woke up after having fallen asleep in the recliner, and had never put his oxygen on. He said he'd had the best night's sleep since his accident, and was pretty happy about that. Teresa joked with him that the reason he'd had such a good sleep was because he was probably passed out most of the night from lack of oxygen. He was playing with the grandkids that morning and joking around with us. Then he got up to go to the bathroom and made it as far as the doorway to my parent's bedroom where he passed out and fell on his side (the side with the broken ribs from his horse accident 2 weeks prior). My mom was still in the bedroom, and David was at the other end of the hall and Travis, Teresa and I rushed in there. Soon Evonne Boone, one of our neighbors/relatives got there and Dad was still breathing and snoring a bit and acknowledged our questions with grunts. With Travis' and Evonne's help my Dad rolled onto his back (we were worried about him laying on his hurt ribs), but then he stopped breathing and Evonne (with Travis' help) started CPR. Soon the paramedics got there and continued CPR, which they did all the way up to the hospital, but they were not able to revive him.

While I am very sad about losing my Dad, I know it is only temporary and that I will see him again. I really feel that the horse accident he had was in preparation for this...it just started the turn of events that Heavenly Father had in store for him. I'm so thankful for my knowledge of the Plan of Salvation and the fact that our family is sealed together for eternity.

I am very grateful that David and I were able to make it home for the wedding and see him again. Very, very grateful. I'm also thankful that Dad was able to get to know Josh for a while. That's one of the things I'll miss most...my children getting to know (and remember) their grandpa.

Anyway, last week was very busy and full of a lot of late nights and little sleep. Thanks to Paul Senseman (my Dad's Chief of Staff when he was Speaker, now a lobbyist) and Mitch Menlove (a lobbyist and LDS bishop), we had a wonderful memorial service for Dad down here in Phoenix on Wednesday. Then we had a viewing on Thursday and another one Friday morning before the funeral. My family and I have felt so honored as people share how he has touched their lives. We have received many visits, phone calls, e-mails, etc. He was a friend to more people than we ever knew. Almost everyone that knew him loved him and he loved them.

I'm grateful for the wonderful father I was and am blessed with and for all of the things he has taught me, including working, managing money and the especially the gospel. I am truly blessed to have such a wonderful dad.

Some memories of my Dad I have had this past week:

1. Cutting his toenails. Sounds funny, I know. My dad's toenails are pretty gross, but I was happy to do it for him. It felt like I was repaying him in small part for all he's done for me, some how. He even bought a special set of "tools" for me to use. On Saturday night he asked me to cut them for him again, because they were starting to snag on his socks. So luckily he now has pedicured toes up in heaven.
2. Cutting cows. Whenever we would go branding, we would have to "cut" the calves away from their mothers, or separate other cows for some reason. Often, especially at Monument Hill, he would have me help him while the others started the branding. I always felt good when I was chosen to help him, I felt like he was showing confidence in me.
3. Burning both ends of the candle. One week during high school I was particularly busy. I think I had stayed up really late finishing a book report, and then woke up early to practice the violin before 7:00 Madrigals. My dad came in while I was practicing and told me I was "burning both ends of the candle" and told me to go back to bed and not go to Madrigals that morning. I really appreciated him looking out after me.
4. Going on trips with him. Because I was single for so long I had the opportunity to go on a few trips with my parents and Kayla. Orlando, FL for a Farm Credit meeting, New York City for the Republican National Convention in 2004, and Chicago, IL for a Fiesta Bowl committee trip to watch a Notre Dame, USC football game. My dad was in meetings most of the time during some of those trips and I actually spent more time sight-seeing with my mom, but they still bring back fond memories of Dad.
5. Living in the condo with him. Before I got married I spent 6+ years living in my parent's condo, and taking care of it for them while they were gone. I treasure those times, because I got to see my dad a lot more often than I would have otherwise. He would often come down on Sunday evenings to a house full of our friends and he put up with our noise and even chatted with our friends and got to know them.
6. Dad "firing" me from the House of Representatives. I had been working as an administrative assistant at the House for almost 4 years when my dad became Speaker of the House, which would have technically been my boss. Because of the nepotism rules there, my dad effectively had to fire me. It was pretty funny at the time, because my dad mentioned it during his speech on opening day and the papers wrote a little article on it. I was very sad to have to quit there, but really it was the best thing for me at the time. I ended up getting an internship with an accounting firm (Nelson Lambson & Co., later named Schmidt Westerday & Company), who later hired me on full time after I graduated. I spent 4 1/2 years at SWCO until I quit after having Josh.
7. Talking with my parents and getting a father's blessing from my dad after the 24th celebration before David and I got engaged. Things were starting to get serious between the two of us, but something David did that weekend upset me. I started for home, crying as I was driving, and about the time I got to the Temple View chapel I decided to turn around and go and ask my dad for a Father's Blessing. I talked with both of my parents about things for a bit and my dad gave me a blessing that calmed me down a lot. Both of my parents are really good about giving advice, which I'm so appreciative of.
8. My dad coming to the hospital after I had Josh. I love the picture I have of him holding Josh. Even though Josh was his 54th grandchild, he was still excited.
9. Dad holding Josh on his lap Sunday morning, not long before he fell and passed away. I thought about taking a picture of the two of them that morning, but didn't, since Dad didn't have a shirt on over his garments.

Here are a couple of video segments and pictures of my Dad:

During one of the many parades he campaigned in


At the Republican National Convention


One of my favorite pictures--Dad on Chester


Dad showing my nephew Trey how to eat carrots


A tribute from my cousin Jeff Flake on the floor of the US House of Representatives

The segment Channel 12 did on my dad's funeral

Also, David wanted me to say that my husband (meaning him) is the hottest ever. I agree. (He didn't really think I would post it.) :)